Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Bringing our boys home: Part 1

So it's been a few days since we arrived home with our boys. What a journey it's been!

Being in Ethiopia was so wonderful. The weather was cool (60s and 70s) since it's the rainy season there, and luckily it only rained for an hour or two each day so we were still able to go out and do things. We wanted to really experience Ethiopia this time since we know it will likely be quite a while before we are able to visit again.

The flight over was absolutely incredible. We had some friends in our church graciously offer to pay for our flights and send us first class, which was so relaxing! We enjoyed the luxurious first class lounges where we were able to rest, eat wonderful food, and even enjoy amazing amenities like a private bathroom with a shower and jetted tub! Our lives have been so busy during this summer season with the band playing at various camps, and I remember thinking the night before we left as I worked to finish tying up all of the loose ends that if only I had at least one day to relax before getting the boys. Well, God answered my prayer! This was exactly what Stephen and I needed, and we are so thankful to have had that time!

We arrived in Ethiopia on Monday evening so we went straight to our guesthouse for a good night's sleep before getting the boys in the morning. We were so happy to see our driver, Yitbarek, whom the boys love so much. He hadn't been the one to pick us up from the airport the night before, and he told us that next morning as we all sipped on some amazing coffee that he had actually quit driving for our agency because they didn't pay him enough. But he said that someone came to him and told him that Esrael and Surafel's parents are back to get them and that we had asked where he was so he agreed to drive again. And the agency gave him a raise to do so! I'm so thankful because our boys treated him like an uncle, and it was so special to have him with us all week. As we drove to the care center that morning Stephen and I could hardly sit still from our excitement of seeing the boys again. We kept saying, "I wonder if they'll be happy to see us? Or maybe they'll understand that they get to come with us this time? Or maybe they'll be scared? Or maybe..."

When we walked inside, one of the nannies directed us to the stairs and as we started to climb it we saw the boys at the top. They both exclaimed "Ah!" when they saw us, and Jude Surafel (4 1/2) literally jumped half way down the stairs into my arms! I hugged him tightly as I kept saying "I love you! I missed you!". Stephen hugged Liam Esrael (3) too, and then we went upstairs to the couches to sit together. We spent about an hour at the care center, playing with all the children and enjoying the coffee that several of the nannies made for us. We passed out little snacks to the kids and roses that we had bought that morning to all of the nannies. When it was time to leave, the boys' nanny, Werkenesh, came forward crying, and kept hugging me and the boys saying, "I love you! I love you!". It was so heart-breaking to have to leave. This woman was truly like a mother to my boys while they were at the care center, and I am forever in her debt for the love that she gave them. Right before we drove away, she came forward again with a picture of herself that she slipped through the window to me. I told her we would not forget her, and that I would send pictures of the boys to her. Seriously, this was so hard to leave her!

We stayed for four days in Ethiopia, and our time there with the boys was absolutely wonderful! The first day they were with us we spent mostly at our guesthouse. The boys were constantly exclaiming "Mommy! Daddy!" literally every 5 minutes or so. We played with the toys we brought, ordered some yummy food in, and gave the boys a bubble bath. When we first drew up the bath it became apparent that the boys had never had a normal bath before. I knew they didn't have a traditional tub at the care center, but still it didn't register to me that this would be a new experience for them until I saw how cautious they were to get in the tub. When they finally let us put them in, they sat down and we scooped up some of the bubble and put it on their heads. They laughed and laughed at that and within a couple of minutes they were splashing and screaming with excitement. Each evening, bath time was what they looked forward to and they spent probably 45 minutes in there each time. One of the evenings, the hot water ran out quickly but the boys were having so much fun they didn't want to get out. When they finally did, they were shivering because our room was so cold. (It had been 60 degrees that day, and our room had no A/C or heat). So I put them on the bed and pulled out my hair dryer. You should have seen the look on their faces! I think they must have thought it was a weapon or something because they looked terrified! After I showed them how the warm air blew out, they both held out their hands and feet for me to warm up with big smiles on their faces.

I was absolutely shocked when the boys went to bed at 8:30 that night and didn't wake up until 7:45 the next morning! I thought for sure they must have just been exhausted and probably wouldn't sleep that well for us in the future. But each day they took a 2-3 hour nap and still slept 10-12 hours each night. Only for one of the nights, Jude Surafel woke up briefly and said, "Daddy?" but went right back to sleep when Stephen rubbed him on his back. This is such a huge blessing that they sleep well, especially since there will be plenty to adjust to and being rested will make it that much easier.

On the last day, we took the boys to eat at a nearby restaurant for lunch so we decided to just walk there. As we walked down the street, several children begged for us to give them food, and a woman with a baby on her back pleaded with us to give her money. I seriously cried each time we would go out because there are literally starving people everywhere, dressed in rags, no shoes, and frighteningly skinny. We kept little snacks in Stephen's backpack to pass out each time we would go somewhere, and occasionally would give out money but we had to be so careful because if others would see money in our hands they would swarm us. I had wondered if it was going to bother the boys to see other children begging. I watched in fascination one day as we were stopped at a light with the window open. Several small kids and women came to the window asking for food or money, and Surafel spoke to them for a minute in Amharic and then reached into his pocket and took out the Ethiopian coins that daddy had given to him the day before. (He had seen them in Stephen's hand and was so proud when Stephen let him have them) He bent forward and placed them in their hands and then looked back at us before laying his head on Stephen's shoulder. I cannot express to you the feeling of both pride in my little boy and anguish over the poverty I was witnessing. It is moments like these that I will most certainly never forget. After lunch that day, we decided to make a quick stop at the Kaldi's coffee shop that was around the corner from our guesthouse. As we were going there, a very young girl with a baby on her back approached and asked in broken English for some food. We asked her to join us, and as we sat at the table she explained to us (with the help of a nice man sitting at the table next to us) that she had her baby when she was 13 years old. I fought to not burst into tears as she told me her story. So many of these young girls sell themselves so that their families will not starve. Then they get pregnant and become moms when they are still little girls themselves. This girl is only about 5 years old than our Kinsey. It is absolutely heart-breaking. We took the girl, whose name I could never pronounce correctly, to the grocery store and told her to pick out some groceries for her and her family. We watched as she timidly, at first, pointed to a bag of rice and then walked up and down the 4 or 5 aisles pointing to random things. I was not about to stop her. After we finished up there, we went outside and talked for a bit, sharing about God's love for her, and then she hugged and kissed us saying, "God bless you!". I didn't promise lightly when I told her we would be praying for her. I'm so thankful to have been able to experience these type of opportunities. I know God uses it to help kill the selfishness in me. When I think of this young girl, all of the materialistic desires that I have here at home start to fade. I pray that God would continue to change my heart to care more for the things that matter and less for the things that will be of no consequence in the end.

The boys and I took a long nap that last afternoon while Stephen went with Yitbarek to buy some souvenirs and coffee beans. Our flight was at 11 pm that evening (all flights out of Ethiopia are in the evening) so we knew we would need our rest. We woke up in time to go with Yitbarek to a really cool traditional Ethiopian restaurant for dinner. It was amazing! They had a stage at the front with a traditional band, and six dancers that would perform various dances in different costumes. At one point the dancers came off stage to dance with people at the tables, and Stephen was selected to stand up and dance with them. It was hilarious to watch as Stephen mimicked their unique moves. I'm happy to say that I got it on video and pictures too, although Stephen was embarrassed when he asked me not to put the video on facebook. Ha! It's funny to see him embarrassed because it doesn't happen often! :) The food was brought out on a large platter and set on the small round grass-woven table in front of us. The injera, or flatbread, covered the bottom and various scoops of saucy meats and lentils as well as boiled eggs were placed all over it. It was so good! Seriously, I really really enjoyed it. Yitbarek helped the boys eat, and we all laughed at some of the silly costumes that the dancers wore. At one point they dressed up as some sort of animal with tails attached that they kept shaking. :)

When we arrived at the airport, Yitbarek spent some time saying goodbye to the boys. I know it was hard for him since he was so affectionate with the boys, and I honestly don't think they realized that this was likely the last time that they would see him. As excited as we were to be heading home, there was so much that we were grieving at the same time.

I'll write more about our trip home and how we are doing now that we are home tomorrow. As you can imagine, there isn't a lot of time for blogging with four kids running around! :) I'm so thankful that they all go to bed at a normal time so that, at least so far, I still have a few hours in the evening to relax. Let's hope that lasts! :)



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